I tried to make a list of things I’ve learned this year. It showed one common theme.
Here’s a very open blogpost on how my year unfolded.
I learned to let go of expectations
Relationships are tough. It’s a balanced mix of giving and receiving.
As a Christian, I was taught to give more than to receive. But for about six months, I found myself in a very toxic relationship that in a snap, God cut me off of from.
It was tough.
I had weeks of asking Him to make things clear if what I was doing was right. As the Perfect Father He is, He taught me patiently that the new track I was walking on now is the right track.
In this experience, God was also teaching me something.
He taught me that in the relationships I was building, I should not go expecting for a concrete return from other people. Because unfortunately, investing in a relationship is not a debit credit equation.
The priorities we put in a relationship is not an equation.
It does not formulate equally.
Investing in a relationship is like computing for your profit and loss. The rewards can be positive or negative with big or small gains. Sadly, it may come with no result at all, a pretty small loss or worse, a huge loss.
The question is, are you willing to take the risk knowing full well that there is no assurance to the return? Or that there may be no return at all?
I learned that most often than not, I would take that risk.
The difference now is, I have let go of any expectations now.
It’s amazing to know that I am able to do this because of God for without Him, I would have looked at myself selflessly and preferred to maintain relationships with whom I know the rewards would be great.
I still do pray about that part of my life God cut off.
He is a God of reconciliation. I’m claiming that in His time. He will do as He pleases and return these people back to me in His good, perfect and beautiful time.
For part two, check out the next post https://captivatedchild.wordpress.com/2018/12/30/letting-go-of-the-perfectionist-in-me-this-2018-part-2/ !